Disposable People?

In todays society with over 50% divorce rate, and the apparent increase in violent crime- it seems as though we have forgotten what a gift life is.  We have made each other disposable- when things get tough or go awry, our first choice is all to often to walk away from each other.  Where does this come from?

I believe we have always done this- to a point- but in todays age it takes on a whole new level.  With technology changing so quickly, we are programmed to upgrade, and replace pieces of equipment when they fail.  Get the newest phone or be out of date- our worth is determined by the price of the car we drive, the phone we carry and how many "friends" we have on social networking.  It can be overwhelming and so easy to fall prey to.

Cars, phones, and other material possessions are just that- possessions, things to be owned.  We are not meant to be owned by them.  Nor are we meant to judge another persons worthiness or credibility based on what their wallet has permitted them to purchase.  It's all smoke and mirrors, isn't it?

Let me share a story that may exemplify this point.  When I was just starting college, my uncle, who was a roofer, wanted to buy a new truck.  He had saved his money for years to purchase a new truck, and went to the show room one day after work.  No cell phone, wearing tar covered, torn jeans, and driving an old rusty truck- he walked into the dealership.  To his amazement, 5 sales people walked right past him- one even dismissing him when he asked for help!

Then, as Fred was getting ready to leave the dealership, a young man walked up to him and asked if he could help Fred.  It was obvious the young man was new to selling cars- Fred stated that he looked to be about the age of 19 or 20- he was nervous, but genuine.  Fred pointed to the truck that he had selected and stated "I'll take that one".  The young man began to ask about what price Fred wanted to pay (let the negotiations begin!), but Fred stated, that he would pay the sticker price.  He asked if they would take a check, and when the young man said yes, Fred wrote him a check on the spot.

This made the young mans day to be sure!  No financing, no negotiating, no hassles.  All he had to do was look past the lack of fancy gadgets, and fine clothes- he looked at Fred as a man, as worthy of good service as any other man.  The other sales people should have learned too.  Five others walked past him because he didn't look like someone who could afford a new truck.  What a shame.

How often do we do the exact same thing?  We look at someone with the newest toys and think they must have it all together for some reason.  That phone was state of the art a few months ago, is now old and seems to be no good anymore.  We treat people the same way.

Wife gets you really mad? Divorce her.  Friends not supportive enough?  Toss them out of your life and walk away.  Job getting tough?  Quit and find a better one.  We treat each other like the newest gadgets- as long as they serve us, we want them; but as soon as they cross us or cannot benefit us in the moment, we want to toss them out with the trash and find the next best thing.

The important thing here is that we are people, not things.  We were created for relationship- and that relationship is to be with God and with each other.  We often forget what a miracle and wondrous gift life is- what a gift our relationships are.  Family, those chosen by God to be in relationship with us, and friends, those lead to us by God, but chosen by us to be in our lives, are essential to our self esteem, our self worth and our well being.  Research has shown for decades that humans require contact, physical, and social.  Take away true meaningful connection, and the human brain begins to suffer irreparable harm.

We need to problem solve, to work through our differences whenever possible.  Cutting a person out to our lives needs to the exception, not the standard practice.  Marriages, family life, friendships, they are all hard, and require great effort and sacrifice on our behalf.  That being said, it is so worth it if we are willing to do the work.  True, meaningful relationships change us for the better.  They give us a sense of security, a safe place to be, a chance to honestly meet the world head on.  When we have strong relationships,  we are more willing to take chances and risks.  We push harder to be better, to excel, to be the best we can be.

Let's take time to work on our relationships, with real communication, and stop making each other so disposable.