When I was a child, I asked a lot of provocative questions of the priests and nuns at my Catholic grade school (much to the dismay of my parents). I once had a conversation with a priest, whom I very much admired, about faith. He told me that you just have to believe, without proof, or you do not have faith. When I questioned how one could believe without proof or explanation, he stated that some struggle with this and that we call those people "doubting Thomas' after the disciple who needed to see Christ before believing he had risen from the dead.
Well, as much as I loved and adored Father Murphy, I think he was wrong on this point and missed a great opportunity. I spent most of my childhood and adult life feeling like I didn't measure up as a Christian, because I sought Christ in everyday life, I didn't have a blind faith. Now, after much prayer, research and thought, I have decided that we all seek Christ for evidence that he is here and hears us. We see the sun rise, and think of him. We call out to him when we are in distress, and seek to feel comforted. We look in our children's eyes and see him in all their hopes and dreams.
The reality is that God aces himself present to us every single day, so that if we seek him, we will find him (Matthew 7:7 states; "Ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened"). Every Christian has a season where they struggle to see Christ, to feel him, and they often go in search of him. It is not enough to say to these people, "Just believe, if you are a true Christian", this is both hurtful and not very helpful. It is akin to telling a blind person "just see, if you truly have eyes" it's silly and does nothing to help the situation. What we need to do is show each other how to have faith.
When I look at my life, I am often taken aback by how blessed I am. The truth is, that after years of hardships and struggles, I have learned that even the trials and tests in my life are blessings. This is not because I read a Bible verse that taught me that (James 1:1-13), but rather because I have read that Bible verse and have seen it played out in my life and the lives of my loved ones. As an example, I had my son as a teenager. I was not a strong Christian and struggled greatly with my faith as a teenager, therefore I made poor choices that made me a mother at 17.
Being pregnant as a teenager, 25 years ago, was not easy. People called me names, family was embarrassed and society as a whole assumed that I would amount to nothing more than a typical welfare mother. However, once I became pregnant, I also became focused on my future and that of my sons. My now husband (his daddy), also became very focused on his future. We worked together to go to college, graduate and make something of ourselves. It was in the consequences of our choice, and the trials of being teen parents that we learned what it meant to look to the future.
When my son was born, I knew that nothing would ever prevent me from succeeding simply because he deserved the best. Suddenly, I was transformed from a wild teenage girl, who partied and started fights, hung out with the wrong crowd and skipped school, to an A student, whose primary focus was the new family taking shape and protecting the innocent child she gave birth to. It became clear that my choices needed to be better to give my son the best possible life. It became clear to me that God used my choices and the consequences of that choice, and used it for good. He changed the course of my life and I knew it.
It's not just big events either-when I am really upset and feel alone, I go to my favorite spot and pray. My favorite spot is a park along Lake Michigan in Milwaukee. I used to go there with my parents all the time, and looking at the lake, reminds me of the greatness of God. See? We seek him and can find him in everyday details. Who among us has not had their breath stolen by the perfect sunset? Who has not seen the hand of God in a severe storm? Who has not felt his comfort when they were at their lowest and their soul cried out to loud to God, it was unbelievable? We have complete trust in God and confidence in him when we go through trials, in part because we have experienced his grace and goodness in our lives. We are like a small child, whose parents can say to them "Don't touch that, it's hot and you will get hurt". Too often, children will touch the hot item and get burned before they believe the parent, but in the future, when that parent warns that child that an item is hot, the child does not touch it-they have confidence in the warning of the parent. We are the same-we often need to experience the consequences of poor decisions, or see God at work before we can truly believe and have faith.
My childhood priest would disagree with me, but even scripture uses examples of Gods greatness to make us see him. In James 1:1-13, James speaks of believing without doubting, which is important, but he also states in verse 11 "For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plan; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business". He uses an example that everyone can relate to, to explain the lesson.
We can feel Gods love, in part because we know what love feels like once we are loved by another (parents, friends, spouse, etc). We know his greatness when we see natural wonders that remind us how small and insignificant we are.
Faith is the complete trust in God. It is the complete confidence in him. Should we have blind faith, without ever needed to be reassured and given evidence? Absolutely we should. However, we are human and as such, we are sinful and far from perfect. We do sometimes need reassurance and reminders. God knows that because he knows our hearts. It is because he knows us so intimately and cares for us so deeply that he gives us people and miracles we need to feel him. Even parents who love their children so deeply, it sometimes hurts, give their children hugs, kisses, trinkets, and words of praise and reassurance. Why wouldn't God, who loves us perfectly and more than we can ever imagine, why wouldn't he do the same for us?
It is by seeking God daily, by recognizing him every day in our lives, and by being in his word daily that we develop faith. When we pray to him regularly and see him answer our prayers, no matter what the answer is, we strengthen our faith. When we struggle, it is important to reach out to others in our lives and listen to them. In the same fashion, we must reach out to those we see struggling and offer them reassurance and reminders of Gods presence in our lives. Sometimes it's a verse from the Bible, but just as often it is simply reminiscing with them about a time when they felt Gods presence strongly, or the wonders of nature and creation.
So, I apologize to Father Murphy, but I think he was wrong. I think our faith is something we experience. It will either strengthen or weaken based on what we do. It must be nurtured as it is fluid and can change dramatically as we go through different phases of life.
No comments:
Post a Comment